


Aequitas

by tahirire



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode Tag, Episode: s05e14 My Bloody Valentine, Gen, Season/Series 05
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-12
Updated: 2010-02-12
Packaged: 2017-10-25 15:59:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/272115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tahirire/pseuds/tahirire





	Aequitas

Aequitas

  
This time it’s not the same.

There’s a difference, when you’re in battle, between getting pinned into a fatal situation and walking into one willingly. It may seem like a small difference - the outcome is the same, after all - but no matter how small it seems, it’s not. It’s huge.

It’s everything.

~*~

It doesn’t take it long to start, and so it starts in the car on the way. Sam’s skin is burning and everything is red, he says _stop, stop the car_ , and _I’m sorry_ , and he thinks _not again_ , and he sees Dean’s fingers gripping the wheel, and Dean’s jaw lock down, and he feels acceleration but he doesn’t see Dean’s eyes and he can’t remember when he is, how he got here or who he’s supposed to be.

A cool hand settles on the back of his neck, and the fog lifts, if only for an instant.

 _I will take him_ , comes the angel’s voice, and he wants to cry in relief, so he does, and he buries his face in his hands and whispers _Dean, please_ , and Dean is all pale and covered in blood - always covered in blood in Sam’s mind - and Dean sucks in a breath that sounds like a last gasp for air and nods, and then

~*~

he’s there, and he knows he asked for this, he knows. He knows, deep inside, where he can’t remember.

 _“Please, don’t do this.”  
_  
It starts in the hotel. The demon woman disintegrates in his hands, drying up like a husk of old corn and blowing away. Power, unimaginable, penetrating, inside and all around him, consuming. This. This is what he hungers for, the _feel_ of it, the _control_.

 _“No, I said no, dammit.”  
_  
After the woman, the man. But why stop there. There are more of them. Others. He sends out the call, and they come. They all come for him, demons, minions, dark creatures he never even imagined existed. They are all gifts from their Lord. He lets them come. He uses them and then he turns them to ash. After the woman, the man. After the man, a girl. After the girl, a boy. Doesn’t matter. They all go down the same.

 _“This isn’t real. Stop! This isn’t REAL!”  
_  
And then the fire. It’s his, he owns it, and he uses it how he pleases. In here, he can be anywhere, anytime. In here, he can defeat _anyone_. The fire rolls from his fingertips, his palms, his eyes. Everything else burns away.

 _“No! JESS!”  
_  
~*~

 _He goes where he was always meant to go. Lucifer smiles at him_. Good work, Sam, _he croons._ Demons, so useful, I agree. _The fire is hungry, it reaches for Lucifer, it flows out from everywhere, erupts all around him, Lucifer laughs, throws back his head and laughs like a mad man, tears streaming down the shredded remnants of Nick’s eyelids._ Sam, Come on. I'm an ANGEL _. Sam backs away, reeling,  
_  
“No! I said NO!”

 _so much fire, he feels it now, burning all around them, this is how he was meant to die, the Devil fades away from his view, not long now before he melts and  
_  
“Sam, come on,”

 _the sizzling quiets, and a cold_ hand is on his chest, his temperature drops and he can’t see but he can _breathe_ , just enough.

“Cas?”

“Sammy.”

He only sees flames, he can’t move, it’s so hot, but there’s ice resting over his heart, protecting it from the flames, and he knows where he is, and when he is, and who he is, and that’s not a small difference.

“Dean?”

It’s everything.

  



End file.
